Jeremy Clarkson and me…well…

April 7, 2011

…we have never in fact met, before you get the idea that we are bosom buddies, both being Northern and all that.

I know as much about him as you do, from watching him on telly, reading those funny articles he writes for various of Mr Murdoch’s organs, and browsing the Wikipedia entry on him, which I have heard had to be rewritten at his behest.

Well, that is, I might know more about him than you do, because I have been force-feeding myself episodes of Top Gear on channel Dave. That’s what happens when the Boss doesn’t take to you and you end up w0rking from home.  Channel Dave gets me through the day. That and garibaldi biscuits.

Anyway, as I was saying, Jeremy Clarkson and me don’t have too much in common. Well, not much other than being middle-aged and  having a bald patch. Mind you, his is spreading much more slowly than mine, and he is so damned tall you can’t see it. Still, it also means he has less testosterone than me, and I will resemble a billiard ball in a couple of years. Swings and roundabouts, I guess.

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